TOYMAKER FOR THE WELL HEELED Apple is on the lookout for an Iphone antenna engineer.
A post for the position of “Antenna Engineer-iPhone” went up on Apple’s website yesterday to supplement similar ones from a week ago. Apparently Apple thinks it needs to hire someone who has an engineering background in order to come up with antenna designs, presumably after its prior efforts have proven to be somewhat less than bang on the money.
Apple’s synopsis of the applicant’s responsibilities are to “Define and implement antenna system architecture to optimize the radiation performance for wireless portable devices.” So, its current band of journeymen must be all out of answers after their wrap-around coat hanger stunt on the Iphone 4 backfired so miserably.
Why Apple thought it was necessary to publicly advertise the position is all the more surprising after a leaked memo suggested that its finest produced a design worthy of some award.
The leaked document, guidance for customer care staff, was drawn up for the firm to weasel out of responsibility for its shoddy design, saying, “The iPhone 4′s wireless performance is the best we have ever shipped.” Well, at least Apple is indirectly taking the rap for the cellular and WiFi reception issues of previous models.
The document continues by ordering Apple’s customer service representatives to “Not perform warranty service. Use the positioning above for any customer questions or concerns.” The document also suggests that “tone when delivering this information is important.” Indeed, sounding authoritative can go a long ways towards convincing customers that they don’t really have a problem, or if they do it must be their fault and certainly nothing to do with the company.
Finally those believing that using one of Apple’s sleeves will be just the job won’t have any luck getting the firm to supply one. The document goes on to say, “We [Apple] are not appeasing customers with free bumpers”, and why should it? After getting fanbois to fork over small fortunes, why should the firm stop at the chance to extract a further £25 out of its well-to-do, dependent users?
One assumes a company designing mobile phones employs antenna engineers, so the question is why is it advertising for applicants? Will these new recruits supplement the current team of wunderkinds or be replacements for those who are presumably sleeping with the fishes by now? Of course Apple won’t disclose this, but fanbois can rest assured that their next Iphone purchase might just have an antenna worthy of picking up a signal.
For Apple the Iphone 4, despite its impressive sales figures is turning out to be a nightmare. Ever since its launch last week almost a day hasn’t passed without another report of faults with Apple’s latest, expensive high-end smartphone.
Thanks to delays, the latest shipments of fruit logo’d disasters are yet to slip into the hands of gullible buyers. After hearing of the glut of problems, the waiting fanbois must be eager to see what’s broken on their shiny toys. µ
